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It's all over bar the counting...

On a personal level, it is such a relief, I feel like I've woken from a 14-year nightmare. Today is a new tomorrow, and once I've slept on it and the final results are in, I should take some time to re-evaluate where I go with my own life from now.

The enthusiasm demonstrated by Carol Vorderman (catch it on #C4BritainDecides on #C4 Catch-Up) should rub off on all of us.

#GE2024 #ToriesAreOut #NastizAreOut
#R4Today #LBC #C4News #Newsnight +

Much enjoyed #C4BritainDecides reprising that Portillo Moment when Michael Portillo lost his seat in 1997, saying

"It's a terrible night for the Conservatives..."

But presumably a great dawn for railway porn?

If not for tractor porn...

And GILLIAN KEEGAN is OUT!

Chichester has gone Lib-Dem...

The bad news (except for Comedy Central) is that MARK FRANCOIS has held his seat.

#PortalooMoments #GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#R4Today #LBC #C4News #Newsnight

Telford has swung to Labour by 24.2%

That is apparently the largest swing ever from CON to LAB during a general election.

We live in changing times, as #C4BritainDecides quipped that the #BBC Swingometer (remember that?) only ever went up to 15%.

Lee Anderson - 30p Lee - has won Ashfield for Reform.

You can fool some of the people all of the time...

#C4BritainDecides #LBC #R4Today
#Newsnight #C4News #GE2024

GEORGE GALLOWAY has lost Rochdale back to Labour.

He didn't turn up to the count, apparently.

#C4BritainDecides #GE2024
#R4Today #LBC #Newsnight #C4News

The Acting Returning Officer for Islington South has turned up in a tricorn hat, robe and chain of office. Returning Officers are taking a leaf out of Count Binface and the Monster Raving Loony Party's Book Of Election Night Etiquette...

Oh, and Emily Thornberry has been returned as Islington South's MP.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

Keir Starmer is returned to Parliament as MP for Holborn & St Pancras with over 18,000 votes.

Elmo got 60 votes.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

ALEX CHALK has lost his seat.

Cheltenham?

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

GRANT SHAPPS has lost to Labour in Welwyn Hatfield!

Labour has taken the scalps not only of Grant Shapps but also Michael Green, Sebastian Fox and Corinne Stockheath.

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

A split in the Labour vote means that IAIN DUNCAN and SMITH, sorry, Iain Duncan-Smith, retain their seat in Chingford.

The Quiet Man coughed as he waited for his chance to speak.

Like other Conservative candidates who've lost tonight, #IDS (Irritable Dunkin' Syndrome) did not wear the familiar dark blue Conservative rosette. It's almost as if they think the Tory Brand is Toxic.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

To #Clacton...

Nigel Paul Farage gets 21,000+ votes.

I cannot even come to say it...

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakf

Labour's Jonathan Ashworth has apparently lost to an independent in Leicester South.

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

MICHAEL FABRICANT is OUT!

#Lichfield has regected Boris Johnson's Mini-Me (and a Wig more than a Whig).

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

The Green Party Co-Leader has won Bristol Central from Labour.

Carla Denyer has beaten Thangam Debbonaire.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

They say "The Good die early..."

And the truly vile go on to retain their seats.

Both Suella Braverman and Kemi Badenoch are heading back to the Commons.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

PENNY MORDAUNT is OUT.

Penny Mordaunt gets to spend more time carrying her sword...

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

JOHNNY MERCER and THERESE COFFEY are both OUT!

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

Labour has held Merthyr Tydfil.

As I grew up there, I'm pleased Merthyr rejected the siren calls from the Faragists (who held their campaign launch there) and did not elect a Reform Party Ltd MP.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

Wera Hobhouse has held Bath for the Lib-Dems.

Labour beat the Nastiz into third place.

Depending on what happens to the Conservative Party in the coming years, many more Bathonians may choose to vote Green at future general elections (their vote rose 12.1% as that of the Lib-Dems declined 12.1%)

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/election/2024/uk/constituencies/E14001080

That conniving Hunt has held onto Godalming by the skin of his teeth.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

Count Binface has, sadly, failed to dislodge Rishi Sunak, our former Second-Past-The-Post Prime Minister from the seat of Richmond.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

It's fair to say that Rishi Sunak has been led by his party to a resounding defeat in the 2024 General Election.

Special Mentions to:

#DavidCameron
#TheresaMay
#BorisJohnson
#LizTruss

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

MICHELLE DONELAN is OUT!

She'll have to pay for her own failed libel defences in future...

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/election/2024/uk/constituencies/E14001356

Labour has now secured a majority.

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

He's gone! Yay!!

JACOB REES-MOGG is OUT!!!!

#JRM can now spend more time with his nanny.

Or his money. In Dublin?

And I'm for my bed....

#PortalooMoments
#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#R4Today #BBCbreakfast

Good Afternoon, all

Thank the ghods we didn't end up with a hung parliament...

I don't think I could've coped with Ed Davey as the Minister for Extreme Sports in the DCMES.*

#GE2024 #C4BritainDecides
#LBC #C4News #Newsnight
#Wato #BBCpm

* The Department for Culture Media & Extreme Sports

So where is Reform's Fuehrer going to spend his summer (and probably autumn)?

#GE2024 #NigelFarage #Farage #ReformParty
#LBC #Newsnight #BBCpm
#C4News #C4BritainDecides

@PhilipCJames I know where he WON'T be: Anywhere near his constituency, or the Palace of Westminster.

@BackFromTheDud

You reckon Nigel Farage will spend his summer wading thru a backlog of Clacton constituency case work in his office?

No. Me neither...

@PhilipCJames As I said: Anywhere but the constituency or the PoW, except for PMQs of course. And his last name sounds like the Malay word for Vagina.