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2019 #MovieBowl Quarterfinal #1

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is Parasite better than Knives Out? I don’t know, does Parasite have Daniel Craig doing a bonkers Foghorn Leghorn/Harlan Pepper accent that somehow absolutely works?

I didn’t think so

I try to be polite, I swear to god, but some of y’all make it extremely difficult

I’m reading Noah Hawley’s Before the Fall, and I keep asking myself if it’s just gonna be a whole novel about rich shitheads. frankly, I don’t have time in my life for any more stories like that

of course I’m still using it. it’s too hilarious

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my mom got me a novelty coffee mug for Christmas that says “I’d agree with you… but then we’d both be wrong”, and I can’t get over how perfectly it illustrates both our relationship and how little she thinks of me

i thought as i got older some of my interests would fall by the wayside as some achieved more prominence over time, but no. i still have a thousand interests. i’m just worse at all of them than ever

I’ve been trying to come up with some text for an audio post and I think I’ve landed on “Well, everyone knows Custer died at Little Bighorn. What this book presupposes is... maybe he didn't”

what must it be like to enjoy recreational drugs without the threat of it destroying your life?

The Muppets Being John Malkovich where the Muppets play everyone but Malkovich.

Hoo boy I can't wait for Nope to come out so I can read the plot synopsis on Wikipedia and find out what it is

food 

I’m pretty meh on most fake meats, but I bought a bag of Like Chick’n Wings and tossed them in Buffalo Wild Wings sweet BBQ sauce, and they really scratched the itch

everyone knows I’m simp

Squirrels
In
My
Pants

I suspect foul play. I have eliminated no suspects.

this country is two more bad economic quarters away from bringing back child labor. i promise there is already a list somewhere of potential cute acronyms for the bill that'll propose it.

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